Healing Dualisms is a solo multipart identity-based project that explores how I connect with the environment and myself through concepts of dualisms, by studying the power dynamics present in social binaries such as nature/culture and mind/body. The project is about giving back agency to nature, which is often portrayed as weak, passive and feminine - and present a powerful, loud and threatening force. I used vulnerability as a tool to connect and embody myself with nature through the use of my voice, my exposed body and by placing myself in extreme conditions in order to do these visual and sonic recordings.
Silencing Nature is the sonic aspect of this project - a soundscape and sound installation, seeking to reflect the power of the elements through human vulnerability. Equally, the aim is to become both the subject and object of my work in an attempt to play with power dynamics and centre non-human agency in the narrative. All the field recordings in this piece were done through thousand kilometres of hitch-hiking and storm hunting in Iceland or part of extreme solo photoshoot expe ditions in the artic circle. This piece is a standalone composition, but it was made to inform the photography, to contextualise the process in which it was produced - to bring the viewer into their own vulnerabilities.
Silencing Nature is the sonic aspect of this project - a soundscape and sound installation, seeking to reflect the power of the elements through human vulnerability. Equally, the aim is to become both the subject and object of my work in an attempt to play with power dynamics and centre non-human agency in the narrative. All the field recordings in this piece were done through thousand kilometres of hitch-hiking and storm hunting in Iceland or part of extreme solo photoshoot expe ditions in the artic circle. This piece is a standalone composition, but it was made to inform the photography, to contextualise the process in which it was produced - to bring the viewer into their own vulnerabilities.
Healing Dualisms
This is the story of a woman (me) finding herself through internal and external pain in powerful environments, mainly to be alone with her thoughts, reconnect with non-human nature, reconnect with her body and seek some form of inner peace throughout her struggles.
I found that the physicality of walking alone to all of these locations, with heavy bags and very little resources - was the most important part of the process for me. Each shoot was a different adventure, sometimes empowering, sometimes extremely mentally challenging. Pushing myself to physical, mental and emotional extremes, feeling the cold, the wind, the heat - was how I used vulnerability as a tool to connect and embody myself with nature.
This was the only way I found to understand why I felt so disconnected, in pain and dissociated. The photos are just the culmination of a middle point to the journey. These photos are a diary of healing my pain. A portrait of my self - and my environment. I found vulnerability as a form of empowerment, and continued to pursue my practice with this lens firmly attached to my life.
Throughout this process I wrote academic research (MM in Sonic Arts and MA in Intersectional Feminism) on the power dynamics present in social binaries such as nature/culture and mind/body - by becoming both the object and the subject of my own work and looking at agency and blurring power dynamics (which will be published in book format in the near future). Healing Dualisms is about giving back agency to nature, which is often portrayed as weak, passive and feminine - and present a powerful, loud and threatening force. Equally, it looks at giving back agency to the body, by presenting a soft, vulnerable, desexualised and intimate female form yet still able to withstand extreme environments with no shelter.
"Feeling disconnected had become an important feeling in my journey - one where I felt alienated from my mind, body, environment, other humans and overall - myself. Through my own battle with depression and identity, I sought after ways of connecting as a means to heal myself. I believe that one of the predominant reasons behind these disconnects is the fundamental structure of our Western, patriarchal capitalist society itself - dualisms and extremisms."
Could the predominant part of our Western neoliberal, capitalist society - the one which relies on resource extraction - be a part of why I felt disconnected? Could the separationist ideals of dualisms, upon which this society is built, be a cause of these feelings of dissociation? Is there a way to abolish these hierarchical structures by reconfiguring dualisms?
My practice focuses on our cultural separation of these dualisms and seeks to create bridges, through embodiment and vulnerability. The concepts of my research are based on ecofeminist principles with the intent of highlighting the agency of human and non-human nature and how the West relates to it mainly asking - What is nature? What is culture? Why is it so disconnected in the first place? Does physicality foster healing? Does reconnecting mind/body and nature/culture foster healing?
From an external and visual perspective, I seek to represent a sense of harmony and intimacy with the non-human part of nature - as a reaction to our ecological crisis and the general Western disconnect of humans with non-human nature, lack of commitment and sense of responsibility - I seek new ways to reconnect the two through embodied materiality and raw imaginaries. From an inner perspective, I look back at these photos and feel proud of what I overcame mentally and get reminded of the beautiful emotional processes I went through, in this quest of identity, in this quest of healing dualisms.
I found that the physicality of walking alone to all of these locations, with heavy bags and very little resources - was the most important part of the process for me. Each shoot was a different adventure, sometimes empowering, sometimes extremely mentally challenging. Pushing myself to physical, mental and emotional extremes, feeling the cold, the wind, the heat - was how I used vulnerability as a tool to connect and embody myself with nature.
This was the only way I found to understand why I felt so disconnected, in pain and dissociated. The photos are just the culmination of a middle point to the journey. These photos are a diary of healing my pain. A portrait of my self - and my environment. I found vulnerability as a form of empowerment, and continued to pursue my practice with this lens firmly attached to my life.
Throughout this process I wrote academic research (MM in Sonic Arts and MA in Intersectional Feminism) on the power dynamics present in social binaries such as nature/culture and mind/body - by becoming both the object and the subject of my own work and looking at agency and blurring power dynamics (which will be published in book format in the near future). Healing Dualisms is about giving back agency to nature, which is often portrayed as weak, passive and feminine - and present a powerful, loud and threatening force. Equally, it looks at giving back agency to the body, by presenting a soft, vulnerable, desexualised and intimate female form yet still able to withstand extreme environments with no shelter.
"Feeling disconnected had become an important feeling in my journey - one where I felt alienated from my mind, body, environment, other humans and overall - myself. Through my own battle with depression and identity, I sought after ways of connecting as a means to heal myself. I believe that one of the predominant reasons behind these disconnects is the fundamental structure of our Western, patriarchal capitalist society itself - dualisms and extremisms."
Could the predominant part of our Western neoliberal, capitalist society - the one which relies on resource extraction - be a part of why I felt disconnected? Could the separationist ideals of dualisms, upon which this society is built, be a cause of these feelings of dissociation? Is there a way to abolish these hierarchical structures by reconfiguring dualisms?
My practice focuses on our cultural separation of these dualisms and seeks to create bridges, through embodiment and vulnerability. The concepts of my research are based on ecofeminist principles with the intent of highlighting the agency of human and non-human nature and how the West relates to it mainly asking - What is nature? What is culture? Why is it so disconnected in the first place? Does physicality foster healing? Does reconnecting mind/body and nature/culture foster healing?
From an external and visual perspective, I seek to represent a sense of harmony and intimacy with the non-human part of nature - as a reaction to our ecological crisis and the general Western disconnect of humans with non-human nature, lack of commitment and sense of responsibility - I seek new ways to reconnect the two through embodied materiality and raw imaginaries. From an inner perspective, I look back at these photos and feel proud of what I overcame mentally and get reminded of the beautiful emotional processes I went through, in this quest of identity, in this quest of healing dualisms.
Silencing Nature
“A few weeks ago, I was swimming in 4°C water, walking barefoot and naked in a snowstorm in the arctic circle, yet the idea of somehow understanding and putting words to my thoughts, actions and feelings - seems like the most frightening thing.”
As singer and sound artist - I started this photography project when I couldn't sing anymore as I fell into a dark place thus seeking other ways of being vulnerable. Once I found my voice again I started recording sound installations that informed the photography and gave it immersive context.
In the process of recording, I was purposely completely out of my comfort, which meant that when fighting the elements, the focus was on surviving intertwined with embodied experiences. Therefore technical aspects of recording were not prioritised, as I was focused on capturing an experience and not a specific tone or texture. Ideally of course, I was interested in recording the strong variations of textures of the wind, so there were a few factors which played into the recording technique. The first being microphone direction. With the shotgun microphone being very directional, I pointed it into/against the wind to get a stronger impact sound on the wind shield. Luckily, the storm which I encountered (registered at 74km/h on location) was very directional and relatively constant, which made the risks considerably lower, allowing me to find shelter if necessary.
As a poet and a singer, using my voice was a central part of this project. My voice, especially my
singing voice, has always allowed me to let go and express deep-rooted feelings. Similarly to my need for being naked and exposed to the elements, my voice is the most exposed part of me and reaches into vulnerabilities unlike any other way. Thus, singing is a way for me to connect. The voice by itself, free, is able to be vulnerable and access deep rooted feelings. I chose not to have any lyrics in the sung part, because I wanted to decentre the anthropocentricity of the piece. At the
risk of this being a ‘voice with accompaniment’ piece, I chose to make space for long sections with no human voice, and then have sections where the space allowed the vocal vulnerability to come through. In some parts the wind takes over the voice and vice versa, the mixing tries to be equal, in line with eco feminist thought.
In the process of recording, I was purposely completely out of my comfort, which meant that when fighting the elements, the focus was on surviving intertwined with embodied experiences. Therefore technical aspects of recording were not prioritised, as I was focused on capturing an experience and not a specific tone or texture. Ideally of course, I was interested in recording the strong variations of textures of the wind, so there were a few factors which played into the recording technique. The first being microphone direction. With the shotgun microphone being very directional, I pointed it into/against the wind to get a stronger impact sound on the wind shield. Luckily, the storm which I encountered (registered at 74km/h on location) was very directional and relatively constant, which made the risks considerably lower, allowing me to find shelter if necessary.
As a poet and a singer, using my voice was a central part of this project. My voice, especially my
singing voice, has always allowed me to let go and express deep-rooted feelings. Similarly to my need for being naked and exposed to the elements, my voice is the most exposed part of me and reaches into vulnerabilities unlike any other way. Thus, singing is a way for me to connect. The voice by itself, free, is able to be vulnerable and access deep rooted feelings. I chose not to have any lyrics in the sung part, because I wanted to decentre the anthropocentricity of the piece. At the
risk of this being a ‘voice with accompaniment’ piece, I chose to make space for long sections with no human voice, and then have sections where the space allowed the vocal vulnerability to come through. In some parts the wind takes over the voice and vice versa, the mixing tries to be equal, in line with eco feminist thought.